its all over the news today so i can't avoid it. i've avoided every tv special, every movie, but you can't avoid when something is everywhere you look.

i can't believe its been five years. time sure flies. today is a day everyone is reflecting on the event, forcing me to think about my own experience.

when i think about five years ago, i remember not just what happened on 9/11, but everything that happened in the days immediately afterward. i remember the smells, the sounds, the sights, and most of all, the indescribable feeling in the air. i try and verbalize these things whenever i tell my own story to others but i never can. my eyes glaze over as the memories play out in my head. i had pictures but i've lost them. i talk to my friends who went through it with me and we all remember it the same way, but we all can't describe what we remember. there are no words.

it breaks my heart if i think about it too much, so i try not to. i just think about how lucky i was. all my friends and family in new york were safe that day. any one of us could easily have been a victim of being at the wrong place at the wrong time. but we weren't. and that's what i want to remember today.