i know everyone in cali wants to throw me out the window for whining and complaining, and for being such a pessimist lately, but i can't help myself. and i'm going to use this venue to vent, so you can stop reading here if you don't want to hear it.
 
i miss new york SO FUCKIN MUCH. i miss my crazy ny alter-ego, i miss my independence, i miss my girls, i miss my team, i miss my ho's (jk), i miss my own apartment, i miss my bi-weekly paycheck (not the job, just the paycheck), i miss the open bars, i miss being drunk and not worrying about getting home. i miss going to my friends apartments to vege out and do nothing. i miss everything about you, new york. :(  i'm homesick for the City like i would never have believed. its so true... you really don't know what you have til its gone. 

i am such an idiot for leaving when i had it so good. i know i made my decision for a reason and it will lead me somewhere, even though i can't see it now. but man, i hate this transition. i do.